Wednesday, 19 January 2011

Day 7 - Post Ibogaine, The Experience!

Thought I'd write a little about the actual experience as I haven't yet!

I worked my dose out at the standard opiate addicted persons 15-20mg/kg dose, at 65ks that meant about 1600mg Ibogaine HCL, I took this plus 1000mg TA Extract the first time and it blew my head off and really took me a long time to recover after, so the second and third times I titrated the dose over 24 hours, this last time I took 600mg HCL initially then another 400mg TA about 6 hours later, both ways of dosing had the desired effect, I just didn't want the nausea and intense hallucinations.

My First time was the strongest, at the full 19mg/kg dose all at once. I did throw my guts up, projectile vomiting, but didn't really have any massive spiritual awakening. I did hallucinate, everything went green and purple and I was in the blitz being bombed by the nazi's!

I was quite upset I wasn't shown anything that could help me change my current behaviours, people say it takes some time afterwards for the bits to fall into place.
Also that war type, violent visions are quite a common theme.

Some people say they felt the ibogaine scrubbing them clean from the inside out, a lot of people meet with the plant spirit too.. unfortunately I didn't get that.
I'm quite a spiritual person so was hoping to have a full on psycho-spiritual experience, shame I didn't.

It's what seems to keep people clean in the long run, that and the occasional booster dose...

Ibogaine has been called an 'addiction interuptor' and that's exactly what it does, it will not keep a person clean long term unless there is a determination from that person. Maybe this is why it seems to work in better with people in they're thirties and over?

It breaks the cycle of addiction, takes away 95% of the acute withdrawal symptoms and PAWS but you also need to keep working at your recovery.

Counselling, therapy, yoga, exercise etc all help a great deal.

Physically, I'm feeling 'ok' still lethargic and suffering with restless legs/night sweats and insomnia but it's all bearable, knowing that I don't have to find cash and score every day makes up for it!

What's really amazing this time is I haven't gone into the chronic depression I did when I came off methadone, ibogaine re-sets dopamine/serotonin receptors to a certain degree. This is what causes PAWS, it can take up to a year for the brain to re-adjust to making it's own happy chemicals and not being flooded with opiates constantly..

It also gets harder the longer you are taking it, I know I struggled a lot more this time around than last time..
Three shots at iboga detox in the last eight weeks!

But I persevered because I knew, the first time I took it that this stuff actually works! It's just how you use it..
I made the mistake of thinking I wouldn't need boosters the first time and paid the price, going back into withdrawal after four days and having to relapse as I couldn't get more Ibo..

The 'trip' isn't scary at all, (mind you I've taken my fair share of hallucinogens in the past) It kind of makes you feel safe, but you know something powerful is going on! After about 6 hours the main vision part is over and you go into a kind of catatonic 'dream state' where you can move much, sleep or eat... This feels like it's never going to end and is quite hard to get through..

Weirdly, Ibo also seems to reset your senses too, food tastes strange, you can suddenly smell in stereo technicolour, and sunlight is so bright, taking a puff on a cigarette tastes like an ashtray full of water.!

My partner made me laugh today, he said 'so from where I'm sitting it seems like people coming off heroin are either crying, laughing uncontrollably or masturbating' ... haha .. sounds about right!


konner said...

Hey man. Nice to see you up and about. I also hear stories of depression coming back after Ibogaine wears off, be it 6 months or 2 months, even with boosters.

What if someone just took boosters for paws instead of an initial flood dose? this for Subutex (long-acting-opiate)?

Anonymous said...

Perfect!!! Best description ever. Please comment on and the research going on at Miami U. Thanks for improving everyone's knowledge!

Gledwood said...

This is a point I've never been sure of, how DO other people feel off gear?

On Subutex i felt lousy for the first afternoon and evening; I slept about 4 hours that night, woke up in a wonderful mood. Interesting that you say 95% OK because that's about how OK I was. Well enough to go down the road and see people later.

What I did notice was feeling hyper-intense. We had a music chanel on TV, not MTV, one with a far smaller playlist and all they put on I found wonderful, I fell in love with every song.

I felt so good during this first few days that I didn't really notice the 95%... 98%... 99% OK-ness on days 1,2,3...

But I've heard stories of people coming off on Suboxone feeling pretty dire for the best part of a week. This cannot all be down to attitude. There's something else going on there as well. Those people might have been better motivated than me, so what was messing everything up for them?

Subutex also made everything smell amazingly strong, which wasn't always nice.... it shone bright and it was amazing. I heard you can get a high snorting it. What kind of high would it be though? And did you ever do Subutex and if so how did it make you feel..??!

Was it just like ibogaine??! (Joke).

I'm glad you're feeling better. That booster dose thing wasn't explained in what I'd read. The miracle cure bit was endlessly discussed; the hows whys and warefores appeared missing!

Deka Lubac said...

Very nice description, experience with Iboga varies greatly from person to person. My husband did treatment with Ibogaine, he was a crack addict ... Today he is very different, Iboga changed our lives. Here in Brazil the law blocking the entry of Iboga, this is very sad ...

Anonymous said...

Studies show to get the full benifits of Ibogaine you should stop using Subutex/ Suboxone for 3 month.
This maybe very hard as you will probably have to switch over to a Short Acting Opiot which is what got you in this mess in the first place! I have heard many providers say they would much rather treat someone comming from Methadone then from Sub.
If Sub is keeping you from killing yourself, then i woud say stay with what works. Although Sub made me feel like a robot. I am a very sensitive person i noticed that i stopped carrying about others and i just went along with whatever. Yes all drugs trake away your true reality, but it never took away that i was a loving and carring person. I started to notice how cold i was twords others about a year into being on Sub. Plus Sub has been very hard to stop, it is way harder to get off then the original reason you were put on it.