Thursday 28 April 2011

My Latest Relapse

Wow... they say heroin addiction is a chronic, relapsing condition...

That always sounded very pessimistic to me, but theres a lot of truth in that statement!

Ibogaine is fantastic for acute withdrawals, and in low doses, physically for PAWS... but for me, the cravings got too intense.

I've relapsed a few times, and I'm struggling. I don't enjoy living like this, when your in pain physically, and all over the shop emotionally, it's very hard not to give in sometimes.
Ive been to see my old psychiatrist anyway, and I'm going onto a short MST script, taper and onto Naltrexone, the opiate blocking drug...

Ill update properly soon..

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Damn. If Iboga-Ibogaine could not get rid of cravings for heroin (short acting opiate) then how hard will it be for long-term methadone/buprenorphine users.

Konner said...

I would have thought all that money and boosters would have done the trick? I was planning to use ibogaine for a long term subutex habbit-dependency, its making me think twice about ibogaine reading other stories of folks relapsing, especially from long acting agents such as Subutex. Hope it all goes well for you Sid. Keep us posted!!!..

Sid said...

Yeah, but you have to take into consideration I have zero willpower!

As I say, Ibo is great for the acute wd period, but I think you need to like move to a new area, start a new life, get a support system etc... not really different to coming off opiates any other way...!

Yeah, I refused methadone/subutex, hence the MST, just waiting for the day they realise giving us diamorphine is the best option!

Anyways, dont let my story put you off please, if you have the determination to do it, you will.. believe me, the first time i got properly clean it was hell-ish, 18 months of low grade wd's tapering methadone then subutex, but I was so determined, I did it..

Im just being a wuss probably...

Konner said...

What about boosters? don't they help the PAWS after the acute WDs?..

Also what exactly is MST? and about naltrexone I don't hear too many success stories with that as some folks rip the impant out of their system or it gives you worse withdrawals and cravings. Why not try Low Dose Naltrexone? which apparently enhances Endorphins by 300% if taken at Bed-Time, meaning helps PAWS apparently, but also don't see too many ppl go that road.

Sid said...

Yeah boosters helP. I just didn't like being out of it on ibo all the time. Plus I kept running out. It's really expensive and I couldn't afford to keep buying it.
Mst is morphine. In slow release form. I'm on 240mg a day. Shorter half life than meth/sub. I'm going onto naltrexone after the mst. Oral. Once daily tablet. I'll take a tiny dose first time to challenge any opiates left in my body. Really don't fancy ending up in prec wd's that there's no way out of.
I don't see many other options for me really. So I'm giving this a try!